I was reading in Genesis during a recent quiet time, when I noticed this short, easy-to-overlook passage:
Now Esau learned that Isaac had blessed Jacob and had sent him to Paddan Aram to take a wife from there, and that when he blessed him he commanded him, “Do not marry a Canaanite woman,” and that Jacob had obeyed his father and mother and had gone to Paddan Aram. Esau then realized how displeasing the Canaanite women were to his father Isaac; so he went to Ishmael and married Mahalath, the sister of Nebaioth and daughter of Ishmael son of Abraham, in addition to the wives he already had (Genesis 28:6-9).
This came after the well-known incident where Esau’s brother Jacob, with the help of their mother Rebekah, tricked their father Isaac into giving Jacob the blessing intended for Esau (Genesis 27:1-28:5). And to set the stage, before this occurred the Scripture says:
When Esau was forty years old, he married Judith daughter of Beeri the Hittite, and also Basemath daughter of Elon the Hittite. They were a source of grief to Isaac and Rebekah (Genesis 26:34-35).
This passage raises the question, how is it that Esau is only now finding out that his wives were offensive to his parents? Clearly, he had not sought their advise before choosing who to marry. That might be normal for our modern society, but it wasn’t the way things generally worked in that culture.
It strikes me that Esau was angry enough that he plotted to kill his brother over a stolen blessing, yet he had not thought to ask his father for a blessing on his marriages. But this is actually pretty consistent for him. Remember that he’s also the man who sold his birthright for a bowl of stew (Genesis 25:29-34). In both cases, he considered his inheritance to be of no great importance, right up until the moment he lost it. He was angry when he didn’t receive something that he had never valued.
Unfortunately, I have to admit that I’m not all that different. How often do I pay no attention to what God tells me to do (or not do), and then expect him to bless me in my disobedience? As if pleasing God only matters when it gets me something I want.
Getting back to Esau – and still being consistent with the character we’ve seen so far – when he finally discovers that he has offended his parents, he still does not go to them for advice. Rather, he assumes he knows what will please them, then goes ahead and does it. The Bible doesn’t tell us whether he guessed right or wrong, but it really doesn’t matter. It was still his plan, not his father’s wishes, that he obeyed.
Of course, we also should recognize that Esau’s parents had pretty clearly not made their wishes known. If Esau failed to seek his parents’ advice, Isaac and Rebekah also failed to give Esau the benefit of their guidance. And that is a critical difference between Esau and us. God has not failed to communicate his will to us through the Scriptures. Which means that you and I have far less excuse than Esau did.
Too easily we forget who we are – children of the Most High God, adopted as heirs of the kingdom. In the New Testament, the Apostle Paul wrote:
The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God’s children. Now if we are children, then we are heirs – heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory (Romans 8:16-17).
In Christ, we have been entrusted with a treasure worth far more than all earthly wealth (Matthew 13:44-46). We have an inheritance waiting for us “that can never perish, spoil or fade” (1 Peter 1:4). Instead of following Esau’s example, let’s treat it like the treasure that it is.